This newspaper is already a bargain, but this week we’re going all out?”five columns for the price of one! How lucky can you get?

Going mad: I am thick in the “throws” of March Madness, as are many other collegiate basketball fans and Illini followers in particular.

Husband Joe endured watching “the” game with me Saturday night and put up with my highs and lows as the game clock ticked. Surely he would rather have been watching a fishing show (which is his idea of a sport) rather than basketball.

When Illinois was down 15 points he was quick to say how they were going to lose, they kept missing shots, they are not making the free throws, etc. Oh, ye of little faith.

Soon the game changed, with the Illini running up and down the court so fast they almost rubbed the words DePaul off the center court and sending the ball into the hoop with enough finesse to impress even the most doubtful of fans. And that that is when Husband Joe had the nerve to say he knew they would win. Well, I wish I had known it sooner. It might have saved my stomach from churning and stopped me from grabbing for the Tums.

Husband Joe is not into the March Madness thing. I’m dragging him into it, and giving him some info as we go. He hasn’t been too aware of which teams were still in it, and when he saw U.K. was one of the teams, he was surprised to see the United Kingdom was participating. Stifling a chuckle, I informed him it was the University of Kentucky. I think he was just kidding. At least I hope he was just kidding.

Hall calling? Someone we can be sure is following Illinois closely this season is Riverside’s Johnny “Red” Kerr, broadcaster for the Chicago Bulls. Kerr was a standout at Tilden High in Chicago, played at Illinois and for the Syracuse Nationals. Later on, he was the Chicago Bulls’ first coach.

Kerr is a candidate this year for the Basketball Hall of Fame and if he doesn’t make it, I would like a recount. Aside from his basketball fame, Kerr is a nice person and deserving of the honor.

Star gazing: No, the Henninger building in downtown Riverside is not being remodeled. It is one of the sites being used in Riverside as a location for a movie starring Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves.

I understand she is very nice, and I would love the chance to find out. Get me a press pass, somebody! I would love to do an interview or be able to get close enough to get some kind of “scoop.”

Do you think they could use an extra extra? After all, I was a drama major in college?

“I’m ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille.”

And can you name which movie that line came from?

Yolk’s on me: Solved the problem about Husband Joe eating the Easter egg with my name on it. I didn’t put any names on any of them. See how easy that was?

If you read my column last week (and I know you did), I wrote about dying eggs with natural materials and using Paas egg coloring.

Well wouldn’t you know a staff reporter from the Chicago Tribune, Bill Dailey, did a feature and had some of the same stuff I wrote about including the natural dying agents and using Paas? Of course since he had a full page plus and pictures he wrote more (and got paid more). I wonder if he read my column. Probably not, but great minds …

Be counted: Don’t forget to vote next week. If you don’t get out and vote, you shouldn’t complain about the outcome.